Given that my last two posts have been, directly and indirectly, about silence, I probably should have seen this coming.
After talking a bit with my pastor and my parents, we all think it would be wise if I took a bit of a break from blogging to simply be silent, to ground myself in spiritual discipline and seek wisdom for the “next step,” whatever that ends up being. (I have my fingers crossed for becoming an international ping-pong superstar… time to proof-text Philippians 4:13 for motivation!)
Basically, I’ve felt for a while that the ground is eroding beneath me, so to speak. Bible-reading is slipping toward “sporadic-at-best” and I’m becoming increasingly incapable of simply sitting still and being with God. I had planned to “come out” publicly at the beginning of May, but such a move would be unhealthy; for all my excitement and passion, I can tell I stand on a very tenuous and fragile stability at the moment.
So. I’ll be taking a bit of a break. I have one more almost-finished post that I’ll put up this weekend and then I will promptly and metaphorically drop off the face of the planet (I superstitiously insert “metaphorically” whenever an idiom would, literally, kill me – can’t be too careful). I hope to reemerge some time in June, at which point, if it seems wise, I’ll set fire to my closet and not look back.
I also won’t be regularly checking GaySubtlety’s Twitter or Facebook for this time, though I will be checking email, so don’t hesitate to metaphorically shoot something my way. If you have any reading suggestions aside from Foster’s A Celebration of Discipline, I’d love to hear from you.
And, finally, I’d appreciate whatever prayer you’re willing to offer on my behalf. I want so badly to, you know, do this whole thing right… but my general proclivity to screw absolutely everything up will certainly loom large during this brief time.
Thanks so much for understanding and for being so patient with me as I struggle to discern what faithfulness looks like for me at this point in my life.
Peace and blessings to all of you.
P.S. I really did only just learn how to embed photos… so… here’s a cute picture of a red panda.